4 Lessons Learned from Long-Term Grieving
Loss can be, and often is, life-altering. Coming to terms with loss takes time and effort. While each person’s process is unique, there are important shared commonalities.
In 1979, my mother lost her eight-year-long battle with lymphoma at the age of 43, leaving me, a shy and sensitive 9-year-old, reeling, grief-stricken, angry, and suddenly living in a confusing new reality.
Fast forward 43 years to today (11/2), the anniversary of her death–she has been deceased about as long as she had been alive. Both private journaling and, in recent years, public pieces-speaking from personal and professional experience-have become a part of how I memorialize her, the latter in the hope that others may benefit.
Especially when children lose parents-something one in 20 people experience, on average-their needs are often unrecognized and unmet, as discussed here. Shame and stigma beget silence (not the good kind) and isolation, impeding recovery on many levels.
Each year brings fresh reflections, renewed connection with my younger experiences, the conversion of bereavement to sadness, trauma to growth and recovery, and greater joy and beauty in relation to the less savory aspects of the human…
