What Exactly Is the Friendzone?

Romance and friendship clash in the boundary-blurring twilight of the friendzone.

Grant H Brenner MD DFAPA
6 min readAug 19, 2022
AngelikaGraczyk/Pixabay

Relationships are shifting, as noted by authors of a recent study of “friendzoning” (LeFebvre et al., 2022), in the journal Imagination, Cognition, and Personality: Consciousness in Theory, Research, and Clinical Practice:

“People habitually do not process new information and use old stereotypes as relationship behavioral guides; as such, they are often mindless when it comes to thinking about the communication in their relationship.

Since relationships are so key for mental health, it’s good to get a handle on what’s happening. Alongside increasing fluidity and renegotiation of core aspects of identity such as gender, culture, and ethnicity -relationships nowadays are evolving, increasingly complex, and undergoing a spontaneous redesign.

Contemporary emerging terminology includes, as elaborated by study authors: “on-again/off-again,” “hooking-up,” “relationship churning,” “back-burner relationships,” “ ghosting,” “backcatching feelings,” and of course the dreaded “friendzone.”

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Grant H Brenner MD DFAPA

Psychiatrist, Psychoanalyst, Entrepreneur, Writer, Speaker, Disaster Responder, Advocate, Photographer